Our subconscious is limitless, like the cosmos. That’s why dreams are so weird and implausible. You’re walking in the woods. It’s a nice day, still dark on the road, the dawn barely stirring on the hills beyond. Walking through an archway of trees, you welcome the first tender, chilly gleam of September daylight. Suddenly, as if by deluge, the trees begin raining raccoons—grotesque ones, all long, pointy, stretched out of proportion. Chaos, an uproar; a racket not unlike a snake in the girls’ locker-room! Can’t be happening. They’re falling everywhere around you, tails erect, desperately clambering away in alarm. Crazy, right? Must be a dream. Nope, this is how a band of tree-dwelling coatimundis reacts when startled. Coati-what, you ask? What kind of animal jumps out of the safety of the treetops when frightened. . . to flee on foot?
We’re talking here about an unusual animal called a white-nosed coati (Nasua narica). Actually, they’re only unusual in the United States, being widespread throughout Mexico and Middle America. There are four species in the world, but Texas has only the white-nosed variety. Southeastern Arizona too.
Coatimundis have small ears; long, sharp claws, and a long, pointed snout that tilts up a little at the tip. Coatis curl their utilitarian snouts in an amazing way above the water surface when drinking. Their long fluffy tail displays dark rings, and they hold it straight up like a periscope when walking around. Long hind legs give them a distinctive frontal rake, and they walk on the soles of their feet like little bears. At 8-16 lbs. each, these critters are odd-looking in the extreme! They sport a black mask with white around their eyes, nose (thus, their common name), and inside their ears. Fur is brown with a mix of red and yellow on top with lighter brown on the undersides. The lower legs and feet are blackish brown. While the camel gets a lot of guff for awkward looks, coatimundis deserve honorable mention!
Coatis are cousins to the raccoon and ringtail; all three are classified in the same family (Procyonidae). In south and middle America where they are more plentiful, coatis are known as Pizotes, or Antoons. In Mexico their common name means “badger,” which they also resemble. They live in mountain forests and woody canyons. It’s likely you have never seen one. . .they are rarely sighted in Texas. Recent sightings have been made in the Padre Island and the Big Bend areas. A suspected sighting (not confirmed) was also made in San Antonio. While TPWD considers them “threatened” in Texas, they flourish in Central American countries.
These animals require a sizeable area of habitat to maintain a viable population. Coatis are very comfortable hanging out in trees. Often, they will sleep there for protection. While tails are not prehensile like opossums, they are great counterbalances for high aerial work. Even so, coatimundis also spend considerable time on the ground. Female coatimundis travel in segregated bands with a menagerie of babies and juveniles as they hunt and gather food. It’s almost like a tribe of Amazons (adult males are excluded, except during mating season). Some of these bands can be 40 individuals strong, so a foraging group can have a “vacuum cleaner” effect on the environment. When two bands accidentally meet in the forest, it’s like herding pigs. . .there’s a whole bunch of sniffing, grunting, and squealing as they greet each other. Sometimes, coatis from one group will leave with the other one—it’s all good when there are no males to screw things up!
Coatis are mostly active by day, particularly in the early morning and late afternoon, and could easily be poster animals for all omnivores. They’ll eat almost anything, dead or alive. Fruit, nuts, bugs, snakes, spiders, lizards, eggs, prickly pear, rodents, carrion; you name it and they’ll give it a shot. Captives have even eaten bread, bananas, and milk. Noses are the key to their palette. Food is found by smell rather than sight. With greedy curiosity they prod and probe, rooting through forest duff and soft earth looking for goodies. Their five toes with heavy foreclaws are designed for digging. If they can smell it, they can get to it. Coatis handle invertebrates (even toxic ones like tarantulas) by rolling them between their paws, quickly killing them, then removing various hairs, bristles, and spines before crunching them up as quick snacks. Bigger prey that can bite or sting are first pinned under heavy forepaws, and quickly bitten through the skull. Everything else is simply gobbled up like candy from a gumball machine.
Aside from jumping out of trees when frightened and traveling in matriarchal “gangs,” coatis have some other uncommon abilities. For example, they can walk upright on their two hind legs like freaky-looking chimpanzees for short periods of time. For another, they are strong swimmers, and on several occasions, individuals have been observed swimming in the Panama Canal. They’re no slouches on the ground either. Top running speed is near 17 mph, and they show amazing endurance when pursued by dogs or other threats.
The social nature of coatimundis is centered around sanctity of the group. We’ve already seen the delicate nature of two troops of coatis meeting in the wild. There are even more protocols when it comes to procreation and child rearing. Males are not sexually mature until about 3 years of age. While breeding habits in the United States are not well understood, studies of coatis in tropical forests suggest that only selected males are allowed to join the band in the spring. It’s as if the ladies understand that males are good for only one thing and purposely limit their exposure before kicking them out again. It’s a business transaction, and it’s not exclusive. More than one male may be allowed in to service the whole band during a breeding season. There are no guarantees though. The same males may not be selected next year. It varies. As for the guys, they compete among themselves by baring teeth, standing on their hind legs, and turning up the end of their noses (just like guys everywhere, right?). For them, it’s better than having to battle a 1,000-pound opponent with a menacing rack of antlers in a head-butting contest! Still, it’s a bleak sex life; some guys may not get lucky until their 4th or 5th year, if ever.
Gestation is anywhere from 10-11 weeks. The bands split up in early summer when the females are about to give birth. Pregnant females make nests in trees, often in the crevices between branches, and give birth to as few as one baby up to as many as six. The pups are born helpless and in need of dedicated mothering for 5-6 weeks, after which every mom seems to know when it’s time to reunite the social band again. As part of the group now, the pups stay close to their mother through weaning at four months. They continue to hang out with mom until she leaves the band again to give birth to the next litter. White-nosed coatimundis live 5-7 years in the wild while their life expectancy in captivity can be as much as 20 years.
On the subject of captivity, coatis are often captured and sold as pets, especially in the illegal exotic animal trade. While they are understandably “cute,” especially when young, like baby alligators they grow up to be something entirely different. Adult coatis are extremely powerful and temperamental; they don’t take well to being in a cage. They have strong sharp claws and canine teeth, suitable for reducing your arm to a bloody stump. Just like raccoons, they are smart, inquisitive, and come with superhuman manipulative skills. This means they can open cabinets, get into food containers, closets, or other belongings and, generally, can destroy your house. It’s like having grandchildren! In Texas, coatimundis are protected but if you feel you MUST own one, you can do it legally provided you buy it ONLY from a TPWD permitted breeder.
The diversity and range of wildlife we have in Texas is amazing, and the coati is one of the most unusual. We often figuratively talk about raining cats and dogs, but now you know it’s possible to actually rain “raccoons.” In Texas, however, you’re more likely to see coatimundis in your dreams than in the flesh. Sweet dreams everyone!
By Larry Gfeller